tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55921442933625241402024-03-13T16:44:57.985-04:00American ShanpieTales from the back of a bike (and other random tidbits)Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.comBlogger86125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-40984674889330031752015-08-05T21:17:00.001-04:002015-08-05T21:17:24.801-04:00Day 6- not the best daySo our plan was to come up the Needles Highway, go through Lead (pronounced Leed), then head up through Spearfish Canyon to see the falls. Well, that's basically what happened with some additional "excitement" along the way. As we were leaving Lead, a tire came off of a truck in front of us, bounced across the road and hit a bike coming in the opposite direction. Somehow, that driver managed to stay up, get to the side of the road, before he let his passenger off and laid the bike down. We stayed there with them and tried to help until the ambulance and sheriff came. They are alive, but have likely broken ankles/bones and lots of scrapes and bruises. Very scary stuff and but for timing could've been us. Thankfully, we are now safe in our trailer while we wait for the rain/hail storm to pass. #thankyouJesusShannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-15465915536862184952015-08-05T00:00:00.001-04:002015-08-05T00:00:43.865-04:00Loooong day 5Decided to go to the Badlands today...Google's "avoid highway" route is no joke. So the only way to get from one little town to another little town is through even smaller towns with cool names like Red Shirt, Porcupine, Scenic, and Interior-population 94. We stopped in Interior at a bar to leave our mark (on a dollar bill in the bar), and meet Double-wide, the bull. <div><br></div><div>We finally made it to the Badlands and rode through to see the ages-old formations. It's amazing to me what a beautiful and diverse planet we live on. We even recreated our pic from five years ago. </div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-saAPbqU5ckQ/VcGKaOjMK7I/AAAAAAAADwQ/eHepUE1VT28/s640/blogger-image--1385414191.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-saAPbqU5ckQ/VcGKaOjMK7I/AAAAAAAADwQ/eHepUE1VT28/s640/blogger-image--1385414191.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>We stopped in to Wall, SD and then headed home. Made it back to camp, logged 310 miles, and bonus(!) missed all the storms!</div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-91934732824442692862015-08-04T00:12:00.001-04:002015-08-04T00:12:29.122-04:00Monday, Day 4We woke up this morning and figured out our plan for the day. We were on the road by 8:45 AM in order to try and fit everything in. I was surprised that so many bikers were already on the road. Hit up Rapid City HD, then downtown Sturgis for the "main event". While the boys walked around a bit (this boot is really limiting my walking) the girls sat and people-watched, with wine! We then navigated through the throngs of scantily clad people (of all shapes and sizes) to head up to Deadwood. The amount of people in the Black Hills for this rally is unbelievable! <div><br></div><div>We ended up back in Sturgis to check out Full Throttle Saloon and have dinner. It's everything the TV show makes it out to be, and more. A real playground for bikers. (Took some pics, but they aren't what you'd call "blog friendly"). A select group got a tiny preview via text, and for that, you're welcome. ;)</div><div><br></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-52734477828830333692015-08-03T23:59:00.001-04:002015-08-03T23:59:39.403-04:00Day 3, part 2As it turns out, I posted yesterday's blog too soon! Once we got back to camp and relaxed a bit (with beverages) we ended up going back through the wilderness loop to see what might be there. We had heard that early morning or early evening were good times to see buffalo. Since we know that the early morning viewing ain't happening, we went around 7pm and saw a HUGE heard of buffalo grazing and trying to cross the street. Very cool! It's really pretty amazing how big (and ornery, yet tame enough to put up with hundreds of gawkers) they are! <div><br></div><div>We got back to camp and threw some steaks on the grill. Had a nice little campfire with marshmallows and decided to call it a night. </div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-zGB--s-XCxk/VcA4qTQ4uNI/AAAAAAAADv8/Q9hQ6MAzNf4/s640/blogger-image--881125367.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-zGB--s-XCxk/VcA4qTQ4uNI/AAAAAAAADv8/Q9hQ6MAzNf4/s640/blogger-image--881125367.jpg"></a></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-16758082458228552962015-08-02T20:14:00.001-04:002015-08-02T20:14:29.162-04:00Sturgis vacay day 3Since days 1.5 were spent in a truck, then the last half of day two was a sleepy haze through the wilderness loop, we were finally able to make it out of camp and see stuff on day three! Mt. Rushmore, Crazy Horse Memorial, Hill City, then finishing it off with a ride through Needles Highway. <div><br></div><div>Beautiful riding weather today!! Lots of bikes, sights, and sun for the 75th anniversary Sturgis rally.</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-hMeBBrJPhOc/Vb6yYv2hIEI/AAAAAAAADvo/8D8awz1GBP4/s640/blogger-image--666233231.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-hMeBBrJPhOc/Vb6yYv2hIEI/AAAAAAAADvo/8D8awz1GBP4/s640/blogger-image--666233231.jpg"></a></div><br></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-67716989954119636922015-07-27T19:00:00.001-04:002015-07-27T19:00:29.671-04:00Sturgis 2015Five years later and we're headed back! Can't wait to see what we'll get in to at the 75th anniversary of the Sturgis motorcycle rally. Stay tuned... <br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-swGHCVab8j8/Vba4CzwBH-I/AAAAAAAADvQ/aonp4JnVHPI/s640/blogger-image--684271486.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-swGHCVab8j8/Vba4CzwBH-I/AAAAAAAADvQ/aonp4JnVHPI/s640/blogger-image--684271486.jpg"></a></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-52574156141049892582014-03-15T13:50:00.001-04:002014-03-15T13:50:47.263-04:00Laundry with Lou LouJust about every weekend Lou Lou tries to give me money for doing her laundry. The convo is usually the same, but today's was particularly amusing.<div>LL: look under the clock and get some money.</div><div>Me: no</div><div>LL: please, sugar, it's the least I can do. </div><div>Me: I'm not taking your money, Lou Lou.</div><div>LL: but it's just a little bit. You can buy a Co-Cola. </div><div>Me: I don't want a Coke.</div><div>LL: well, then you can get a Pepsi.</div><div>Me: I definitely don't want that! </div><div><br></div><div>Pepsi might be born in the Carolinas, but Coke Is It!</div><div><br></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-10563631290037847572014-02-11T20:41:00.001-05:002014-02-11T22:17:22.444-05:00Buddy's new rideBuddy and Bailey, aka 'the boys', will be 11 years old this month. I know they aren't young pups anymore, but I wasn't prepared for just how quickly Buddy would age. Over the past nine months or so, Buddy has slowly lost the use of his hind legs. It's a disease called <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canine_degenerative_myelopathy" target="_blank">degenerative myelopathy</a>, or DM, a disease of the spinal cord that starts with his hind legs and progresses to the rest of his body over time. There isn't any medication for this, but luckily, he isn't in any pain.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We've been researching doggie wheelchairs. There are several types available, but most just didn't seem right for Buddy's needs and size. So, Jim built one. We determined what a basic design would need to look like and he made it come to life. It took us longer to purchase the supplies from Lowe's than it did for him to actually make it! When we put Buddy in it and he took some steps, I couldn't help but cry. Tears of sadness that he needs this assistance, tears of happiness that he was able to use it and get around.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here's a little video of Buddy sporting his new wheels. The corners are a bit tricky, but with chicken as the prize, he'll do pretty much anything!</div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxaUTNfVIUh_vx4GCw2evIXedSY-Y7h9qyFNeszCQzry64tdetqCy8oBjv1kh8L3dXDPVwByFyjez9b-XbgPw' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<br /></div>
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-46572574748789350392013-09-05T16:40:00.000-04:002013-09-05T16:40:43.572-04:00Mom's Music<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px;">About two months ago, I finally felt ready to go through some of mom's things. I decided that I would start in the basement where, as many of you know, she taught piano lessons. I took lessons when I was younger. A year or so from one of her piano teacher friends, and a while from her. (That debacle lasted about two weeks I think!) So often I am asked if I know how to play, and I have to say that I don't. Mom always said I would appreciate knowing how to play the piano when I got older. And guess what - she was right. I do wish I knew how to play now so that I could carry on the beautiful music she made and taught to so many. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px;">But I don't, and so what to do with all the 30 years of music, games, books, etc. that filled the basement? One of mom's very good friends and a fellow piano teacher, Polly, offered to go through the music for me, keep what she would like, and give the rest a good home. So after an afternoon of packing up the basement with the help of Claudia (luckily she's cheap labor and can be paid back with wine!) I dropped off a truck load at Polly's house. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 15px;">Recently I received the email below from Polly. It brought tears to my eyes, and I felt the need to share it with all of her friends and students. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #cc00cc; font-family: MV Boli; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><i>"Just a note to let you know what I did with your mom’s music. I went through all the music and took the books and items I thought I could use. It was a bittersweet time because I saw many things we had bought together and many of the games and books we had shared over the years. Then I put the rest out so the teachers in our teacher group could come by and see if there was anything they wanted. They had the same feeling I had --- that we were with Cree again and so in addition to trying to take care of her music, we had a time of remembering your mom.<u></u><u></u></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><i>Today Cecil and I took the music that was left down to the <u></u>Raleigh<u></u> <u></u>Community<u></u> <u></u>Music<u></u> <u></u>School<u></u> –located on <u></u><u></u>Tucker Street<u></u><u></u> in downtown <u></u><u></u>Raleigh<u></u><u></u>. They currently have 100 students enrolled – these are students who would normally not be able to afford lessons – and 15 teachers. Your mom’s music will provide these students with the books and sheets and some games they need because most could not pay for music. </i></span></span><i style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 11pt;">I gave the school your mom’s name and explained that the music was from her studio.</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><i>I also found a book of music quotes that she and I bought one year in <u></u>Savannah<u></u> when we were on our way to the International Piano Teachers Conference in <u></u><u></u>Orlando<u></u><u></u>. The book had sayings that we both loved. I took that book to Allen Herther who once worked for Burrage and now has his own music store and Cree thought highly of him. He came to her memorial service. I gave it to him on his 50<sup>th</sup> birthday and told him it had been Cree’s.<u></u><u></u></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><i>I just wanted you to know what happened with her music – that everyone was appreciative not only of the music but that Cree had been a part of their lives. So her music will continue to help young students become musicians."</i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #cc00cc; font-family: MV Boli; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-size: 15px;">Mom, your music will live on. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-size: 15px;"><br /></span></div>
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-50368277841265138552013-05-31T10:29:00.000-04:002013-05-31T10:29:24.072-04:00GratitudeOn this particularly tough day I'm thankful for all of the support and love that my friends and family have shown over this past year. <br />
<br />
My grandma, Lou Lou, who after finding out about her daughter's passing told me, "I'll give you all of your mother's love." She is so strong and I am grateful to have her and still have that piece of my mom. We'll celebrate her 89th birthday tomorrow with her favorite, caramel cake, and my mom's recipe for lemonade cake. <br />
<br />
My brother, who left his life in Miami and moved home. This has been a trying year for him but he has shown a love and maturity that is beyond measure. <br />
<br />
My dad, the best diddy ever. Still taking care of us, still taking care of their rose garden. <br />
<br />
My mom's cousin. We both lost our best friend and have found support in each other. Texts, wine, calls, and confidants. <br />
<br />
My uncle, who helped us make difficult decisions and continues to be there for us and love us no matter what. <br />
<br />
My friends, both new and old, giving me such support. Your phone calls, texts, hugs, notes, and gifts mean so much to me. I know it's hard to know what to say during something like this, but just knowing you are there for me is the best support you could offer. <br />
<br />
My mom's friends. I appreciate you reaching out to us, offering your kind words and stories about my mom. I know she was so thankful to have you as her sounding board, counselor, and support system. <br />
<br />
And last but not least, my husband. My mom loved you very much and was so happy that I found someone like you to be my life partner. I appreciate your love, patience, and hugs, even on my toughest days. Thank you for being my rock. I love you.Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-77682392682163560622013-05-30T16:04:00.000-04:002013-05-30T16:04:41.839-04:00One more night......and this nightmare year will be over. There will no longer be "firsts". My first birthday without her, first Thanksgiving, first Mother's Day. All of those are behind me.<br />
<br />
I wish it was like a switch. When tomorrow is over I would magically feel better. But I know that won't happen.Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-25641805231427033102013-05-12T20:22:00.001-04:002013-05-12T20:22:50.498-04:00Mother's DayI can't say it was the best Mother's Day, but, it was a good one. I'm missing my mom a lot this month, but I also have a lot to be thankful for. Last year we had a really good day. My parents, Jim's parents, we enjoyed a nice dinner and good laughs. It would be the last time I'd see my mom alive. I'm so thankful for that day, and I know she was, too.<br />
<br />
Today I got to see my grandma, Lou Lou. She lost her daughter last year, a loss I can't fathom even though it was my mom. But she was with her son and three of her five grand kids today. I hope she had a good day.<br />
<br />
Today I was with my mom's cousin, a woman that lost her best friend last year. We have developed a friendship that I am so thankful for. Someone that I can share things with, laugh with, and drink wine with. I hope she had a good day.<br />
<br />
And we had BBQ today. With hushpuppies involved, it HAS to be a good day!<br />
<br />
Happy Mother's Day, mom. I miss you.Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-2757029648915249712013-03-14T16:00:00.001-04:002013-03-14T16:01:58.136-04:00Bikers need Jesus, too.U +GOD= :) <br/><br/><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-4xCUf539pp4/UUIsbnhJyYI/AAAAAAAADn0/p_--33-XV80/s640/blogger-image-2021473298.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-4xCUf539pp4/UUIsbnhJyYI/AAAAAAAADn0/p_--33-XV80/s640/blogger-image-2021473298.jpg" /></a></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0Daytona Beach International Airport Daytona Beach29.192826 -81.063077tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-87066550287432947542013-01-09T12:44:00.001-05:002013-01-09T12:44:07.015-05:00My CapricornIt was April 2010 and something made me look twice at the email from the handsome man with the kind blue eyes. His dating profile indicated a few criteria that didn't quite match with my "ideal" mate, but hey, I was 32 and divorced. Not really a time to be choosy. And, he was a Capricorn. So I let slide a few of my must-haves and decided to email him back. Since I'm a Virgo, I already knew what the horoscope websites said about good astrological matches for me. Other Virgos, Tauruses, and Capricorns, with Capricorns topping the list. So what if he was the same height as me and a Yankee. I'll just put away my heels and feed the man some fried chicken and collards, because he's a Capricorn!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Yc9kReJhrLM/UO2rvvUsazI/AAAAAAAADnU/uLLPlGn6scs/s1600/Jim+profile.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Yc9kReJhrLM/UO2rvvUsazI/AAAAAAAADnU/uLLPlGn6scs/s1600/Jim+profile.jpg" height="220" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
Well, you know the rest of the story. What you may not know is that my mom was also a Capricorn. She and Jim got along famously. They were like two peas in a pod, sometimes annoying little peas, but always with the best of intentions. God knew what he was doing when He put Jim in my life. He knew what would happen a short two years after meeting each other. And thankfully He made me reply to the blue-eyed Capricorn. While Jim could never take the place of my mom, he has filled many voids that were left when she passed. He supports me beyond measure. He knows how to cheer me up. And he would do anything for me. <br />
<br />
Happy Birthday, baby. I'm so happy you're my husband.<br />
<br />
Post Script: As it turns out, he doesn't mind when I wear heels and he drinks more sweet tea than should be legal south of the Mason-Dixon. <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YjRYHnP9ufc/UO2rvr4Ix3I/AAAAAAAADnY/7wf5-MeA6Xo/s1600/wedding.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YjRYHnP9ufc/UO2rvr4Ix3I/AAAAAAAADnY/7wf5-MeA6Xo/s1600/wedding.jpg" height="320" width="213" /></a></div>
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-63558596285934171912013-01-02T16:26:00.002-05:002013-01-02T16:26:38.406-05:00A few of her favorite thingsI <a href="http://americanshanpie.blogspot.com/2012/11/because-i-like-to-punish-myself.html" target="_blank">posted a few weeks ago</a> about going through my mom's gmail account and deleting emails. I did it again today and logged into her Pinterest account to change the email preferences. By logging in as her, it brought me to her profile page where she had written a short description of things she likes. <br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><em>"I am a lover of beautiful things-outdoors and flowers with
garden art bring a smile to my face. I teach piano lessons to anyone that
enjoys music. Antiques, silver, and old linens make me smile."</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
And that made me smile.</div>
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-23431953710605464972012-12-28T19:29:00.001-05:002012-12-28T19:29:40.294-05:00It's almost overIt's my mom's birthday. We always went shopping after Christmas and last year we went on her birthday. We found my wedding dress that day. It was a good day. We spent it together. <br />
<br />
My family and I received a lot of cards this Christmas. Lots of "I'm thinking about you" and "I know this Christmas will be hard". Well all I've been thinking about is her. And yeah, it was hard. <br />
<br />
Luckily this year of "firsts" is almost over. Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-57250359157887317502012-11-16T13:15:00.000-05:002012-11-16T13:15:18.347-05:00Because I like to punish myselfI occasionally check my mom's Gmail. I don't know why I haven't deactivated the account, but I haven't. Somehow, the thought of deactivating it will erase "her". The messages she would have seen about music, and roses, IKEA, and the 'Canes. The emails she exchanged with me, my brother, and her friends. <br />
<br />
Over the past few months, when I'm feeling particularly strong, I go in and look at a few of the emails from before and also try to clean up her inbox. It's a slow Friday at work so I decided to do it today. 253 unread emails in her inbox. Then I clicked on the chat function. <br />
<br />
I'm not sure why it hasn't occurred to me before to click on it. I guess because I don't save all my chats. But she did. I already knew what we talked about the night she died. But there it was in black and white. The words I wrote to her and she wrote back to me. Random stuff about a new rug I got and plans for the lunch we were having that weekend for my grandma's birthday. But at 9:00pm on May 30th I read the last thing she would ever say to me, "he was kind and softspoken". She was referring to my brother's doctor. I had sent her a link to an article that one of my friends on Facebook had posted and among other things it happened to contain a picture of him. <br />
<br />
After that, I just signed off to go upstairs. I didn't say, "goodnight, I love you", and that makes me sad. <br />
<br />
I read through a few of the other chats. Some with me, others with her friends. I went back to this day last year to see what we were talking about. Plans for Thanksgiving food of course. Then I had to stop. That's enough punishment for one day.<br />
<br />
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-49731052875389561582012-08-31T20:56:00.002-04:002012-08-31T20:56:55.425-04:00Already?Somehow, one-quarter of a year has passed. A lot has changed. So much that I want to talk to her about - laugh with her. We could make each other laugh so hard that we really should've been wearing Depends on more than one occassion. <br />
<br />
Like this one time, we were painting my brother's ceiling a light blue. I was standing on the bed and she was standing on a chair. The house phone rings. High on paint fumes, I bent down to answer the phone that was sitting on the bed. Hello? Hello? Phone keeps ringing. Mom starts laughing. I look at her like, <em>why</em> are you laughing, and <em>why</em> is the phone still ringing when <em>clearly</em> I have answered the dang phone! Well, she had unplugged that phone from the wall jack without me knowing. We couldn't stop laughing. And I peed in my panties a little. <br />
<br />
Three months gone. Already. Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-73773699990764782832012-08-29T20:58:00.001-04:002012-08-29T20:58:55.906-04:00TomorrowThis is not going to be a happy blog. There, you've been warned.<br />
<br />
I'm dreading tomorrow. For every birthday wish that comes my way, I'll only be thinking of the one I won't hear. <br />
<br />
I appreciate the cards I've received, the presents from friends, lunches, laughter, and wine (I might have more bottles than Total Wine now). My husband threw me a surprise party this year. About two months ago I asked him not to. I did not want to celebrate my birthday. Despite my request, he did anyway. And we had a great time. Secretly, I'm glad he did it. It's exactly what my mom would've wanted...for me to be happy, with a husband that takes care of me. <br />
<br />
Five years ago my mom and I disagreed about something. It caused a rift in our relationship for a few months. Despite us not being in the best place with each other, she still came to my work with a card, cake, and present to make my 30th birthday special. It's what she did. She always made the effort. A few months later my life changed pretty dramatically, we got over what came between us, and we became best friends. <br />
<br />
Tomorrow is going to be a tough day. I probably should not wear mascara.<br />
<br />
Oh, and birthday bonus...I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Ugh.Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-26737079663106399162012-08-19T11:55:00.000-04:002012-08-19T11:55:10.959-04:00I needed a moment<div>
I had the idea for this post immediately after our wedding, to attempt to document the overwhelming feelings I had during the ceremony. I never did start it, for one reason and another, but after this weekend, I decided to write. </div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
I needed a moment during our ceremony. Everything was so overwhelming, the words of the preacher, our surroundings on the beach, the many friends and family that attended, and the man standing before me. Both of us had been through so much to get to this point, and finally finding each other, when the preacher asked me to repeat our vows after him, I had to take a moment. I knew I couldn't go on without completely losing it. So I paused - for a good while. </div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
Fast forward five months. This weekend we went to the historic Fair Barn in Pinehurst for the wedding of some good friends of ours. Two people who, like us, have been through a lot and have finally found the love of their life. It's also the first wedding I've been to since my own. There were so many emotions in the room and in my head. She walked down the aisle to Rascal Flatts' song, "Bless the Broken Road", and I lost it. Jim kept asking if I was ok, and I wasn't. I wanted to run to the side before the tears got the best of me but couldn't as I imagined the clip clop of my heels on the historic wood floors would break the peacefulness of the ceremony. So I sat.</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
With lots of tissues I made it through the candlelit ceremony. The heartfelt vows that each of them wrote, their precious son in the tiniest tux you've ever seen, passing and blessing of the rings, and the special necklaces given to each of their daughters. Everything was perfect, and I'm so happy they've found happiness with each other.</div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
</div>
Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-4030241800256867812012-07-04T09:44:00.000-04:002012-07-04T09:44:03.266-04:00Dream or Nightmare?I've had three dreams about my mom. The first was just her coming up an escalator, then I woke up. In the second, we were shopping together like we would've done one random weekend. Kohl's, Penny's, looking at shirts, commenting how ugly some of the clothes are or how we'd never be able to fit into those jeans. <br />
<br />
The third dream was last night and it was the most real of them all. I got a call that she was alive. I went to my parent's house and there she was, in a turquoise skirt and shirt. I hugged her, not believing what I was seeing, asking her how this was possible since she was cremated. She replied, "the doctors put me on life support." (hey, it's a dream, it doesn't have to make sense). My aunt and my grandma were there talking about what's been happening since she died. I stood off to the side, observing, not believing it was possible. Then I saw that she had found something that I've searched her house high and low for since she died-wishing many times I could just ask her where she had put it last. I asked her where she found it. She told me that it was under the cabinet wrapped up in towels. Next time I'm at dad's I'm going to look there. <br />
<br />
Each morning after these dreams I wake up wanting to just go back to sleep so I can see her again. I hate these mornings.Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-67136681498524543152012-06-18T21:23:00.001-04:002012-06-18T21:23:52.220-04:00Thirsty?<div><br/><img src='http://lh4.ggpht.com/-CExeYKkgGdE/T9_Ufs_6AbI/AAAAAAAADlY/H8tJhAZmxDs/2012-06-18%25252020.41.28.png' /></div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-49632663546955502872012-06-15T22:47:00.001-04:002012-06-15T22:53:23.424-04:00This time last year...<div><p>The man I love proposed. I called my mom first to tell her the news. She already knew. We drove to my parents' house to tell them the whole story, take pictures, and show the ring. We were so happy and excited.</p>
<p>When we got back to our house there was champagne and balloons on the front porch. She dropped them by while we were still at dinner. She was always so thoughtful.  </p>
<p>Tonight I miss her. </p>
<p>This has been a tough week.  </p>
</div>Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-87923567691630788692012-06-10T21:47:00.000-04:002012-06-10T21:47:03.325-04:00I wonder...Is there registration in heaven? How long is the wait?<br />
Are family and friends that have died before waiting for you when you get there?<br />
Do you immediately get your angel wings or is there a trial period?<br />
Can you eavesdrop on people on Earth?<br />
Is dog heaven and people heaven the same? <br />
Is there chardonnay in heaven?<br />
Can you eat whatever you want with no consequences?<br />
Are you outfitted with what you died in or do you get an unlimited closet to choose from?<br />
Can you watch TV and movies?<br />
Is there an alternate form of communication rather than phones or email?<br />
Is there some better vacation spot than the beach? <br />
Do people get assigned a "job", except it's your favorite thing to do ever?<br />
Is there money in heaven? <br />
Do you need an alarm clock in heaven? <br />
Can you review your life, like on DVD?<br />
Do you get to choose your friends? <br />
<br />
Mom knows the answer to all these things. I will, too, one day. <br />
<br />
<br />Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5592144293362524140.post-4565773202097271062012-06-07T20:01:00.001-04:002012-06-07T20:01:37.633-04:00Too happy?God is punishing me for being too happy. I've told everyone about my good fortune, the wedding, how great my life is, what a wonderful husband I have. I have bragged too much, and now He's taken it all away. <br />
<br />
Deep down I know it's not true. Things happen for a reason. God has a plan. When will I know the reason?Shannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03006215454417572910noreply@blogger.com1