This is not going to be a happy blog. There, you've been warned.
I'm dreading tomorrow. For every birthday wish that comes my way, I'll only be thinking of the one I won't hear.
I appreciate the cards I've received, the presents from friends, lunches, laughter, and wine (I might have more bottles than Total Wine now). My husband threw me a surprise party this year. About two months ago I asked him not to. I did not want to celebrate my birthday. Despite my request, he did anyway. And we had a great time. Secretly, I'm glad he did it. It's exactly what my mom would've wanted...for me to be happy, with a husband that takes care of me.
Five years ago my mom and I disagreed about something. It caused a rift in our relationship for a few months. Despite us not being in the best place with each other, she still came to my work with a card, cake, and present to make my 30th birthday special. It's what she did. She always made the effort. A few months later my life changed pretty dramatically, we got over what came between us, and we became best friends.
Tomorrow is going to be a tough day. I probably should not wear mascara.
Oh, and birthday bonus...I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Ugh.